Monday, May 19, 2014

In My Pants


So here it is.

Pants make me feel safe. I hide behind them, in them, and through them. 

They allow me to transform and present myself into the appearance of a white MALE when worn properly. 

And in this country to be MALE is still more powerful than female. To be WHITE holds power too.

Presenting as a female to most career opportunities and social situations that rely on commercially authentic lady looks has never gained me much.

But through my jeans I discovered that when people think I'm a white male I get more trust, protection, and respect.

In NYC even I've been experimenting with Craigslist. I've applied to several gigs as a landscaper, handyman, 
bartender, server, plumber, etc. I've done so equally as a male and a female.

As a female I was able to babysit, do one landscaping gig (after putting in my response I was a lesbian), one handyman gig (after putting in my response that I'm a lesbian), and work as a cocktail waitress. I've applied to over 30 gigs as a female and have been hired for five.

As a male I have applied to 34 gigs. I have received only four rejections for my services. I have worked as a plumber, electrician, landscaper, bartender, server even consultant at a Wallstreet event  I had previously applied to as a woman and been rejected for.

I learned a long time ago that it was much safer and beneficial to look like an attractive young white male than a woman of any ethnicity.

And I've been exploiting that.

People say it's wrong. They say I should be proud of my femininity and that I should learn how to find my way as a powerful woman into success.

But I have.

It's called capitalism.

I'm selling a product... Me. And I want to be worth as much as I can so that when people buy me, I make more. What's worth more in this country than a white man? 

Times are changing slowly, and that may not be the case in the not so distant future...but for now it is. And I intend to capitalize on that. Because I KNOW I don't make as much as. 6'2 androgynous woman... and you can't expect me to just roll over and take that can you? Hell no! It's called marketing and branding folks! And sometimes you've got to rebrand yourself to have a higher chance at success and market yourself appropriately.

People ask me... What about women's rights? Aren't you perpetuating the idea that white men are better than everyone else by conforming to look like one?

The answer is yes and fuck no. When I apply to places, I'm essentially pulling a Mulan. People hire me based on their connectivity to my email, image, and references sided with their general predetermined needs for the position. When a woman gets hired as a man to do a job that a man should be doing, and can successfully perform it without being detected as a woman... It says women are of equal capability.

For me though, this isn't about women's rights. It's about survival rights.

If I'm trained, skilled, and capable of doing the same labor typically given to males then I should be allowed to pursue it. As long as my performance reflects an equivalent nature of those around me in that field. To deny me the ability to do so simply because I have tits and a knack for shooting out babies is to say that I don't have the same survival rights as everyone else. 

And everyone deserves the equal right to survive.

It's not about the gender. It's bout the skills we have to survive, thrive, and apply.

So for me, I have found my skillsets. Plumbing, electricity, carpentry, nannying, cooking, cleaning, landscaping, and most importantly... Appearing as whoever the fuck I need to to get the job.

I'm an not my gender. I am me.

Are YOU?

Demand more rights to survive.


  1. I'm always amazed (in a good way) by your constantly unique perspectives; that you never allow yourself to get boxed in.

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