Letter to Mens Designers from Someone Without a Penis Who Looks Good in Their Clothes

WARNING: the following article was written after consuming a lot of icecream while listening to SIA and WoodKid on repeat. Therefore it's chock full of concepts and statements that are a little awkward and overly boisterous. Definitely tangential in a bulletpointed way. Most certainly it's a little cocky, but hey- that's the mood I'm in today. So...welcome. 

Dear "Mens" Designers 

What are you afraid of? Why can't you put me in your clothing for advertisements or runway shows? What qualities do men have that I do not?

If you are concerned about the physiological attributes needed to fill out your garments in the most effective way...I get it. Granted I do not have a penis. My pecs aren't firm and square...they're firm and round. Growing facial hair is not my forte and likely not possible without steroids. 

But so what? Is that all your brand means when you wear it? Does it stand for penis, beards, and pecs? Or does it stand for something bigger?

When someone buys a garment or accessory it's because they feel it says something about them that can be heard without even having to vocalize a single word. 

Most times they aren't purchasing an item so that people know they are penis or pec capable. Most times they purchase and don something because it says they are delicate or adventurous or fancy or ready for hard work or efficient or bright and bold. 

Clothing is beyond the basic necessity of protecting our flesh from the elements. It's about creating a microenvironment for ourselves. A safe haven of expectation and culture. 

So what culture are you trying to promote that your clothing is most beneficial in?

Is it that you feel the people wearing your clothing are more likely to attract a sexual partner? Or to put it bluntly.... Do you feel that your wares are supposed to help MEN attract WOMEN? And when you put MODELS in your garments on the runways you are looking for MEN who are already capable of attracting WOMEN and mayyyybe other MEN? Just so it's easier to illustrate your point?

Well if that's the case, then heads up- I fit that check mark. In your clothing, other brands of clothing, and NO clothing I've found I'm more than capable of attracting the WOMEN annnnd MEN that I want. Trust me, I know what women want sexually and emotionally...I am one. And I give them exactly what they need except for a baby biologically. but that saving on birth control and lube sure is a persuasive perk. I could give any male model in your line up a run for their money. 

You may be like...Ok I Get It...You're Gay. Woot. (or whatever your lingo is). But what about actually fitting the clothing? You've got to be tall, toned, broad shouldered. 

Well geez are you in luck! I'm 6'2 so...not to freak you out but just because I have a clitoris does mean it stunted my upward growth. My shoulders? Well they are farmerstyle, broad and toned from years of manual labor. Also surprise but people with ovaries aren't always born into manicures and tea parties. Exhibit A.

Oh what? You want someone who isn't soft and gentle. Delicate or afraid. You want someone who exudes confidence?Someone who you feel can carry you out of a burning building? Someone who is a real gladiator and take a punch? Someone who isn't looking for a break? 

Well while I can certainly play the soft role of letting someone else take the lead. Flipping my three inch long hair to get it out of my eyes and flicking my wrist to emphasize a statement like I'm drunk. Using a slow lean with cleavage like a promise or a badge to coherse someone to treat me better...  I can do all this, but that isn't all I do. While there's nothing wrong with playing on "grace" to get me by- let me tell you, I'm a shrewd business person. I'll do what works to get me further without hurting others or compromising my moral compass. The end goal of creating a safer world is all that matters. 

But don't be afraid of that "soft" side of me. I have many sides. If you were in danger, I have no problem taking a punch for you. I won't leave you behind in the case of a fire...I WILL carry you out. I will defend you in the case of aggression both verbally and physically.

As far as someone who exudes confidence... Confidence comes from being at peace with yourself. Knowing yourself and not being afraid of your limitations. My journey to self discovery as not just someone with female sex organs.. but someone who is sexually interested in other people with female sex organs and on a large public scale has been one that has forced me to be more okay with who I am than most people ever will be. I have to be unapologetically me, or I will drown in other people's disapproval and oppression. I have fought a war that may never end. I'm confident I will continue to do so and nothing you can tell me will make me afraid of you or chip away at my identity. 

If all you are looking for is a label. That term that I'm a Man. If you're just afraid of the whispers that you are not taking your craft seriously by pandering to a woman then Dammit call me a man. I don't care. in all reality... I am nothing. Neither a man nor woman. I am a human. I just have specific anatomical capacities that I am satiated with and do not want to change.

Don't be afraid of my clitoris. It's not my story. 

My story is my path, both past and future. The path I am on, it's limitless. It's infinite. It's unobtainable by another because it's mine. My path is that of a woman only due to my sex organs. But that path tells a story with the characteristics you likely want people to find in your clothing. 

You deserve to have the most success possible. To get there, open yourself up to all possible target audiences and unchain yourself from limitations on your consumer market.

If you're trying to say that someone who wears your clothing is attractive to people with female sex organs, strong, protective, intuitive, successful, treating themselves like a business then look no further. I fit all the criteria. And I can promise you that your company won't fall apart if you hire me. 

Xx

Rain Dove